


A Dangerous Combination

by TheAvengersMascot



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Amused Bruce, Bets & Wagers, Clint is a genius, Community: norsekink, Crossdressing, Lingerie, Maria is so done, Mentioned gender issues, Multi, Natasha Knows Everything, One Shot, Protective Thor, Tony didn't think this through, a bit cracky, does that surprise anyone?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-17
Updated: 2014-09-17
Packaged: 2018-02-15 02:10:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2211825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAvengersMascot/pseuds/TheAvengersMascot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>This is wrong,</i> Tony thought. <i>This is every shade of wrong. </i>A man should simply not look that good in women's clothing. Especially not one tall, dark, (reformed) supervillian.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Dangerous Combination

**Author's Note:**

> _All characters belong to Marvel_
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>  I've been really hard on Loki in some of my other fics. (And by some I mean all). So I thought he deserved to have some fun. Hope you like!
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> Filled for [this ](http://norsekink.livejournal.com/12950.html?thread=32421270#t32421270)norsekink prompt.

_This is wrong,_  Tony thought. _This is every shade of wrong._ A man should simply not look that good in women's clothing. Especially not one tall, dark, (reformed) super villain.

Loki strolled into the kitchen that morning like nothing was different. Like he was wearing the same sweats he always wore to bed after he discovered the simplicity of Midgardian sleepwear. Not at all like he was wearing, well... all of _that_.

"Good morning all," he said lightly.

To Tony's left, Steve coughed and sputtered, choking on his breakfast. The Cap was as open minded as anyone but really, seven a.m. was waaaaay too early for this shit. And he was only halfway through his morning coffee, no less.

"Uh, Loki? What are you doing?" Bruce asked after he managed to pick his jaw up off the floor.

"Making breakfast," Loki said flatly.

"And your... uh... outfit?"

Without looking up from his meal preparations, Loki answered, "I made a wager with Stark. I lost."

The heads of the other two men swivelled around to face Tony at the same instant. For once, the great Tony Stark was rendered speechless.

"What kind of wager?" Steve demanded, having recovered from his misguided attempt at inhaling his food instead of swallowing it and sounding like he was inches away from beating Tony senseless to defend Loki's honour. Like the bastard had any. Surely his current antics spoke to the opposite.

"Whoa there, spangles," he replied. "This wasn't the bet-"

"Of course it was," Loki contradicted him, sounding as innocent as could be. He even had the gall to put a bit of hurt into his voice, like he was offended at the suggestion that he was somehow not satisfying the terms of their bet.

"No no no, you're not putting this on me," Tony shot back, annoyed that _Loki_ was the one who lost yet _he_ was the one feeling awkward about it. "The bet was loser wears women's clothing for a day. Not all..." he waved in Loki's direction, "That!"

The reason 'that' ensemble had everyone so riled was that while Tony had envisioned a skirt and blouse when they agreed on women's clothing for the bet, apparently Loki had a very different vision. One that involved a silk corset, fishnet stockings (complete with garters), and stilettos. Yes, stilettos. Not to mention that from where Tony was sitting, he was pretty sure Loki was also sporting eye liner, mascara, and lipstick.

Oh, and by the way, did anyone mention that it was unbelievably hot?

It shouldn't have been in the least bit attractive. Loki was well over six foot and while he wasn't as broad as Thor, he wasn't really effeminate in any way. The lingerie should have looked ridiculous but it _didn't!_ The corset flattered his lithe torso, slimming his waist and accentuating his hips. Delicate black embroidery further drew attention to the lines created by the garment. The deep green silk contrasted nicely with its black lace trim and Loki's dark hair, giving Tony a rather definitive answer to why it was always green with Loki. The dark colours of the lingerie against Loki's pale skin was almost reminiscent of a geisha. (And there go Tony's thoughts into _really_ inappropriate places).

Then there was his legs, and oh man did Loki have _legs_. Not many guys could pull off pantyhose, let alone fishnets, but Loki not only pulled it off, he looked stunning and... no... no, he didn't... did he?

Tony tilted his head to one side as he squinted to get a better look. Yeah, that's what he thought. Loki was not only wearing pantyhose but he'd shaved his legs, maybe even waxed them. Part of him wanted to applaud Loki's commitment while another part of him was just a teeny bit frightened of the same but either way, there was no denying it, Loki had great legs and apparently no qualms about showing them off. They just went on _forever_. And those garters-

A sharp smack on the back of his head broke the spell, jarring Tony out of his thoughts.

"Quit gawking," Steve admonished.

Both Steve and Bruce were staring at him instead of the major distraction that was Loki wearing women's underwear.

Tony shook his head "I didn't... I wasn't-"

"Sure you weren't," Bruce interrupted, looking far too amused by his distress.

Out of sight of the two killjoys, Loki sashayed - yes _sashayed_ \- over to the fridge. Good god, he even had the runway walk down, swinging his hips like a supermodel. As Tony watched the frilly skirt of the corset flutter around the tops of Loki's thighs, he discovered he had a whole new problem. One that had nothing to do with the Captain's disapproval of his gambling habits or Bruce's _I'm-pretending-to-be-serious-but-I'm-secretly-entertained_ attitude. There was a lot of blood rushing to a certain part of Tony's body that was about to, ahem,  _raise_ an issue. Just getting a glimpse of, among other things, the barely there panties attempting to cover Loki's behind underneath the corset's skirt was doing things to Tony that he doubted he could pass off as morning wood since he hadn't actually gone to bed the night before.

Just as Tony tried to subtly put his Stark Pad over his lap, Clint and Thor walked in. Clint, proving he was smarter than all of them, took one look at Loki, said "Nope," and walked out without saying another word. Any hope of Thor restoring some sanity to the situation was snuffed out but the completely casual way he said, "Good morning, brother," as if Loki didn't look like he'd escaped from a Victoria's Secret fashion show.

"Good morning, Thor," the sneaky bastard replied, utterly nonchalant.

So while Thor snatched a box of Pop Tarts and tore into them without even heating them up first, Steve was still looking at Tony like he didn't believe any of this was Loki's doing, like he thought it was a ploy on Tony's part to either indulge his own fantasies or embarrass Loki. The hardening member between his thighs was going to make it hard to refute the first charge and as for the second, from the suggestive way Loki bent down to retrieve something from a low cupboard, it was obvious he found nothing shameful about any of it. Not that Rogers saw it. No because Cap was busy staring at Tony like he expected him to apologize or something, he didn't see the way Loki bent at the waist, leaving his ass in the air and showing off the lacy panties, nor did he hear the soft sigh as Loki straightened up again. No way was any of that an accident. Even Bruce couldn't pretend to be above it anymore. His eyes were fixed on Loki too now.

Tony cleared his throat. "Hey, uh, Loki? You don't really have to do this. It was just a dumb bet. I''ll let you off the hook."

Loki whirled around, aghast. "Some of us are men of our word Stark. I'm insulted you'd even suggest such a thing."

"Huh?" was Tony's ever so eloquent reply. In fairness, it was hard to concentrate when his eyes kept trying to slide away from Loki's face and down his front. It took every bit of focus he had to keep them from following the lines made by the boning and embroidery down to where the skirt ended.

"Oath-breaking is a serious matter, Stark," Thor said. "Enough to deny entrance to Valhalla."

"It was hardly an oath. Nobody swore on the Bible or anything," Tony protested.

"Nevertheless, once our word is given it would be the height of dishonour to go back on it," Thor informed him.

"But _he's_ not going back on it. _I'm_ saying he can-"

Tony was cut off by Natasha coming in with Maria Hill at her side. Hill did a classic double take before rolling her eyes, pulling out her phone, and flat out ignoring Loki. Natasha's reaction was a little more surprising. After the half-second of surprise, she took in the sight with visible admiration and again, Tony's mind was sent running in a really unhelpful direction. Before he could rein his imagination back in he was seeing Natasha in a similar ensemble... then Loki and Natasha together... then Loki and Natasha forming a Tony sandwich...

"La Perla?" Natasha asked.

"My own creation," Loki answered, beaming. He seemed quite flattered someone of Natasha's discerning tastes would think his ensemble came from such a high end boutique. "Though I drew inspiration from some of their designs."

"It's gorgeous. I'm a little jealous," she returned, in no way helping quell the lewd thoughts in Tony's head.

He indulged his fantasy romp until he noticed Natasha's eyes on him. Shuffling a little in his seat, he fervently hoped she hadn't developed telepathy since their last meeting.

"Anyone care to explain this?" Maria asked, sounding tired already despite the early hour.

"Loki lost a bet to Tony," Bruce explained.

She sighed. "Loser wears lingerie?"

"Something like that," Tony mumbled.

Hill rolled her eyes again. "Alright, I only came to make sure you all remembered the briefing scheduled for this morning and that attendance is mandatory even for billionaires who make immature bets," which she accompanied with a pointed look aimed at Tony. "I expect you _all_ to be fully clothed when you arrive at SHIELD HQ."

"Even Loki?" Thor asked.

"Even Loki."

"But the wager was for one full day," Loki explained. "I will not be made to dishonour myself."

Tony couldn't believe they were having this conversation and from her exasperated expression, neither did Hill. She closed her eyes and massaged her temple with her free hand. "Then have somebody get you a pantsuit or something. You all need to at least _pretend_ to be grown-ups."

With that she spun on her heel and headed for the door, all the while muttering something that sounded like it included the words 'bunch of five year-olds', 'Coulson', and 'taser'.

"Pantsuit?" Loki echoed, eyebrows furrowed.

Another time, Tony would have enjoyed that rare moment of confusion from Loki over Earth terminology. Right now though, he was a bit preoccupied by the fact that Romanov sat down right next to him at the table and he really didn't want her to see what his tablet was hiding.

While Bruce started explaining to Loki what pantsuits are, Tony turned to Natasha and tried to act normal in an effort to keep her attention above his waist. "So what were you two doing out so early?"

"We went out for breakfast," Romanov said, her tone altogether too knowing. With just one sentence she made him feel like she saw right through him, which probably had less to do with the words and more to do with the penetrating stare she was giving him.

"And you're back by 7:15?" he asked, his voice pitching annoyingly high the longer he talked. _Way to keep your cool, Stark._

The corners of her mouth curled up a little. It was her 'You're fooling nobody' face. "Yeah. Some of us like to keep a low profile."

Her eyes went down to his lap on the word 'low', removing any question about whether she knew the truth. She didn't sell him out though, and if she didn't, Tony wasn't about to do it to himself. He glanced over to Loki who, having been informed about the wonder of female business attire, actually looked a little disappointed.

"Is it a requirement of some kind?" he asked.

"No, but I'm sure SHIELD would prefer you covered up," Tony said.

"Covered up?" Loki looked down at himself, still with that uncertain and hurt look on his face. "But I thought... I like this. It feels... I like it."

Tony's mouth was about to run on with a retort when Loki's eyes came back up. All the confidence and cockiness was gone from them. In place of it was something that looked a lot like nervousness. Then Loki bit his bottom lip, an oddly childish looking action on him. The contrast between his earlier behaviour and now was shocking. Tony had never seen him appear so unsure of himself and his first thought was Loki was still messing with him, which would be a perfectly logical explanation except Thor's posture became pretty defensive the same time as Loki's demeanour changed. Though he might have just been playing along earlier by acting normal, now the Thunderer was poised and ready to pummel anyone who hurt his brother.

 _Oh, god,_ Tony thought. _Is Loki a trans person or something? Is this his roundabout way of feeling out the rest of us for a reaction?_ The last thing he needed was to send Loki over the edge again if gender was a touchy subject because the last time Loki lost his mind, it resulted Tony learning there was such a word as 'defenestration'. As if that wasn't enough motivation to fix this, Steve was giving him the 'Do Something' look again.

"Uh... I mean... they'd probably prefer you wear something resembling... uh... professional attire when you're there for official business," Tony hedged. "You can keep all of... _that_ on underneath if you want. We just need to look like serious people on the outside."

_And Pepper said I have no PR skills._

Loki said nothing, just hesitantly ran his fingers along the hem of his skirt. That move, combined with his slouched shoulders, made him look like a child asked to give up his favourite toy.

 _Maybe she was right. Oh man, there's gonna be another world subjugation attempt all because I made a stupid bet and insulted a gender fluid alien_.

"You guys are hopeless," Natasha said, rising from her chair. "Come with me, Loki. I'll help you find something that says 'I'm serious' on the outside."

Loki brightened up, seeming to be intrigued by what other kinds of female clothing he could try. The two of them left, and with them went most of the tension that had so abruptly arisen.

"Do you ever think before you speak?" Rogers asked.

Tony shrugged, making sure the motion didn't move the tablet still covering his still very much present erection.

"Should we not get ready for the briefing?" Thor asked.

"Yes we should," Steve agreed. Brawn and Blond both stood from the table, and started to leave. Steve hesitated when he noticed the other two not following. "Don't you two need to get ready?"

"I'm ready already," Tony replied, wincing at his inadvertent rhyme.

Bruce piped up, "I'm still eating."

Tony waited until the other two were fully out of earshot before glancing across the table. "Your plate is empty."

"And you still need to get changed," Bruce countered.

They stared at each other for a beat before Tony said, "You too?"

He shrugged. "It was the garters."

"Yeah, the garters," Tony repeated. _And everything else._

~~~|~~~

Loki closed the door of his room behind him, a smirk turning up one corner of his mouth as he did. This was the most fun he'd had in a long while. Stark's reaction was his favourite, though Banner's and the Captain's were rather entertaining as well. He still couldn't understand why Tony thought he was interested enough in the sporting events of the mortals to wager on the outcome. He hadn't even watched the tedious event that Stark was nattering incessantly about. Loki only took the bet in the hopes that it would shut the mortal up and allow him go back to his reading. It didn't work, not even when the event was over and Loki's team lost. The only amusing part of it all was that Tony actually believed wearing female clothing would embarrass Loki. Why would it, when he'd lived as a woman for years at a time and had done so without feeling the slightest bit of shame. Clearly the man had not done his research. In any case, it provided a golden opportunity to make him squirm. After all, it was Stark who neglected to specify the _type_ of women's clothing Loki should wear. Such limited imagination when dealing with the God of Mischief.

There wasn't much entertainment to be had by letting Stark think the idea of donning female clothes actually bothered him. On the other hand, seeing if he could arouse the man by donning garments more suited to a courtesan was something worth his while. Not to mention, hilarious. Tony's feeble attempt at hiding his state with that Stark Pad of his was so transparent it almost destroyed Loki's composure. And the Avengers were only the beginning of the fun.

He'd forgotten entirely about the briefing they were to attend and couldn't believe his luck when Maria brought it up. The ensemble Natasha helped him craft to wear to the meeting left almost as little to the imagination as the underclothes did. He wore no tunic underneath the jacket, leaving the top of the corset clearly visible. It's skirt was removed for the day, ensuring the trousers were tight in all the right places and ended at just the right length to show off the stilettos. Natasha proved herself quite the artist, touching up his make-up to add even greater effect. She was a worthy ally even without knowing the whole scheme. The sheer level of distraction he caused both the male and female personnel of SHIELD by simply walking through a room was hysterical. Loki lost count of the number of dropped files, personnel who walked into walls, spilled coffee, and other incidents that followed in his wake. It was almost more fun than he'd had in years. Almost. The day wasn't over, after all, and Loki was confident that something even better that flustering half of SHIELD was about to happen.

Just as he finished doffing the pantsuit and reattaching his skirt, Loki heard the door open behind him. "I've been expecting you."

Maria favoured him with a sly grin as she shut the door behind her. "I know. That was quite a performance you put on today. I'm sure you have everyone convinced it was about messing with Stark and the team."

"My dear Maria, I have no idea what you mean." Loki reclined on the bed, extending his arms above his head in a lazy stretch before bringing them back down to prop himself up on one elbow.

Hill took off her boots and set them by the door before coming to sit on the edge of the bed. "You shouldn't pick on Tony so much. He's gonna catch on."

"I know," he conceded. "But he is the most fun. The man has no... oh what's the term... poker face."

Maria nodded with a smile, something she didn't do enough in Loki's opinion. Though if he was honest, Loki would have to admit he liked the idea that he saw a side of her no one else did. She reached out and ran her hand along the seam of his corset, fingering the lace at the bottom.

"I have to ask, how did you know?"

Loki put on a coy face, despite how at odds the expression was with the stays he was still laced into. "Know what, my darling?"

Her fingers travelled down the garter on his thigh, pausing at the top of his stocking. "That I like this."

"Mother always said I was perceptive," he answered. He took a moment to observe her, or more specifically the hunger in her eyes. It was time to begin their game. He let his eyelids fall to half-mast. Demurely looking up at her through his lashes, Loki asked, "I'm ready, my mistress. What would you like of me?"

She gave him another smile, this one seductive and wicked. "That depends. Have you been a naughty boy, or a naughty girl?"

Keeping his innocent face in spite of the heat rushing to it at her sultry tone, he answered, "I'm afraid I've been a bit of both."

Maria crawled over top of Loki, making him to lay back beneath her. He stared up at her, completely at her mercy. Just the way he liked it. She held there for a moment, the ends of her hair just stopping short of brushing his face, before she leaned in to murmur in his ear, "Well, I think I know just what to do about that."

Loki's lips curled into a mischievous grin of his own. "Yes, mistress," he drawled, his voice no longer so innocent. 

She pulled back fast enough to catch him still smiling. Maria shook her head and pursed her lips. A moment later she slid off the bed to rummage around in the drawer where he kept a collection of, shall we say _special_ toys for their trysts. She was going to punish him for breaking character.

 _Excellent_.

**Author's Note:**

> To the OP, I'm sorry I didn't use your pairing. I didn't start the fic with any ideas but once I got this one, I couldn't let it go. I hope you don't mind too much. 
> 
> Comments are lovely. You can also come say Hi to me on tumblr at [ theclassicblunders](http://theclassicblunders.tumblr.com).


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